Last August Gannon and I attended the Chazown experience at our church. Chazown is the hebrew word for vision and it helps you find your “purpose” in your life. It was 3 days after my surgery and the beginning of our whole fertility process. I went in with no expectations and was just excited to meet new people from our church. That weekend I really felt like God was calling Gannon and I to start a LifeGroup. I was scared and honestly felt like really God, you want us to start one now that we could possibly have this long fertility journey ahead? I eventually brought it up to Gannon and he was like always super on board about it all and said if God is telling you we need to do this we can run from it. Life got busy and like so many times in our life we kept pushing off the decision to follow through with our calling.
Fast forward six months. Gannon and I went to the Chazown experience again, but this time we were table leaders. Once again God made is so apparent that I needed to get things rolling with a group. And at this point in our life the timing was perfect. Gannon and I got into contact with the LifeGroup leaders at our church. Of course they were super excited and on board for us to get started. We finally started the process of filling out the paperwork, chose a name, and figured out a purpose for the group. We knew we wanted it to be a couples group, but we literally had NO couples in mind that we were going to invite. Gannon and I started intentionally praying that God would open doors up for us and allow us to meet new couples that we could potentially invite to our group. That is when we got asked if we could start serving the 11:30 service and start helping run the host team. Before Gannon and I were ushers and it was great getting to see everyones faces, but hard to really make connections with people because we were there to help them find a seat.
Through this process i’ve learned that if God is giving you direction in your life he will open up the right doors to make it possible. And that is exactly what he did! Through our new volunteer position we have been able to reach out to so many different couples. It has been so amazing to see God working directly in our life. Last night we had our first open house bible study and it was so much fun getting to meet everyone! I told Gannon it was like having a birthday party when you were little and you weren’t sure who was going to show up! But once again God provided amazing couples for us!
My whole goal through our journey to becoming parents was to allow God to use me in different areas of my life and to challenge me. I truly feel like if we were able to get pregnant right away we would already have a precious baby and our lives would probably be “too busy” to start a LifeGroup right now. And I have such peace knowing that with each door God opens for Gannon and I it’s just one step closer to the day we will become parents. This is why we aren’t parents yet because God is able to use us in unimaginable ways that Gannon and I never even thought were possible! I can’t run and hide from His plan in my life. I have to be willing to let God use me and mold me into the wife and (someday) mother we wants me to be. And I know that if we continue to follow his direction for our life we will be amazing parents for it someday.
Proverbs 16:3 – “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”
Hope everyone has a fabulous weekend!