One day at a time…

Let me just be real for a moment. This whole process has been more emotionally, physically and mentally difficult than I could ever imagine. Since starting Lupron and metformin I have really tried to steer clear of reading any of the side effects. I just really didn’t want to freak myself out or make me feel like I had some of them when maybe it was just all in my head. But that ended up back firing. I just have to remind myself that the medicine I am taking is serious. Lupron is also used to treat prostate cancer in men. And for someone who really just hates taking medicine in the first place, this has been a huge learning curve for me.

Last Saturday I took my last birth control pill so I knew this week I was going to start experiencing some of the side effects. Lets just say Wednesday afternoon they came in full throttle. This past weekend my best friend from elementary school got married and I was a bridesmaid!Β  We left early Wednesday and of course as soon as we get to Alabama my time of the month decided to visit.Β  The following day I met some friends out for lunch.Β  While I was sitting there waiting for the food to arrive I started to feel like I could faint. I have never fainted or felt that way, but the best way for me to describe it was I just felt like I was about to die. I instantly started praying and asking for God to please make this feeling go away and for him to make me feel better. After I drank a lot of water and ate a little bit of food the feeling finally started to disappear..for a little bit. After talking to Gannon and telling him how I had a come to Jesus moment and literally felt my life flash before my eyes I called my doctor. My precious nurse called me and said that what I am feeling is pretty normal. The Metformin I have started taking regulates my blood sugar levels and I really need to try and eat something every 2 hours. When I first heard that I was like uh huh like anyone would have time for that! But she said that I basically have to think about myself as being a diabetic. I need to start regulating my blood sugars and making sure they don’t drop…hence the almost fainting moment. Thank goodness growing up my best friend was a diabetic so I know a lot of about how regulate it. But now I have A LOT more sympathy for the way she would feel in certain moments when her sugars would drop. Sorry I wasn’t so sensitive about it before, Danni πŸ™‚

Unfortunately, the whole weekend I just didn’t feel like myself.Β  I was afraid that during the ceremony I was going to faint and ruin my sweet friends wedding. Thank goodness I didn’t πŸ™‚ But I’ve come to realize that when I am scared or experience any moments like that I instantly want Gannon there. He has been so amazing and constantly reassuring me that everything is ok. He is definitely my rock when I feel weak.

Here is a picture of my beautiful friends wedding! They were pretty much out of a magazine! Oh and my mom and sis decorated the arch with the flowers! Isn’t it beautiful?!

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One more of them because I just can’t help myself!

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The wedding was in Mobile but Southwest only flies to Pensacola so we decided to extend the weekend and stay on the beach for a couple days. Plus we were long overdue for a girls trip! And there’s nothing better than having my bestie, who’s also a nurse there to answer any of my crazy questions!

Here is a picture of all us on the beach! The lady who took the picture said say “Chocolate dingle berries” how can you not laugh at that!

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Today I had my bone density test. This test just makes sure my bones are strong enough to experience the side effects of menopause. Once I am done with the Lupron shots my bones should be able to regain more strength. Just another fun symptom to throw into the mix πŸ™‚ I will get those results in a couple weeks.

Here’s the handsome hubby who has been by my side through everything! Playing on his huge new iPhone!

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This is a picture of the bone density machine.

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Right now I would just ask you all to please be praying for assurance in this situation. I am struggling with feeling like we are making the right decisions. I knew it would be a difficult road, but never anticipated it to be this hard. I’m not angry but just discouraged and wondering why we have to go through all this when so many other woman get pregnant so easily. I know God knew this was going to happen way before we could ever imagine it and I know he has a plan during all this. Like I have said from the beginning my goal is to help reach out to other woman who are struggling with the same issues. So I want to just be real and vocalize some of my struggles during this whole process. I promise they will not be all this depressing!

Thanks again for keeping up with our journey! At this point I am just going to continue to take this whole process day by day. “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34

Have a great weekend!!

XO,

Kate πŸ™‚


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